Marysville: Then & Now, Part 1

[NOTE: This piece was ported over from a much-older website, and some of the formatting and photo sizes aren’t presented as originally intended. As soon as I hire a quality control staff, these errors will be corrected.]

I certainly have no regrets about leaving Marysville – my home of two years – behind in favor of the relatively cosmopolitan Sacramento (insert snickers from San Franciscans here), but I do owe Marysville a little bit of respect for its history. It was already a bustling city when California gained statehood in 1850, although little remains to be seen of its original character. This is due primarily to two undisputable facts: 1) The pioneers and a couple of generations after them seemed unable to prevent themselves from burning things to the ground every few years. In Marysville, this tendency stuck around well into the 1950s, long after fire departments had been invented. Maybe it’s something in the water. 2) City planners in the 1960s and 70s seemed to get some kind of perverse kick out of replacing handsome, vintage buildings with buildings that looked like giant cinder-block shoeboxes. I understand that it’s sometimes too expensive to restore old buildings and they have to go, but it’s unfortunate so many of them went at a time when the Hideously Ugly school of architectural design was in vogue. (If you can find one example of a nice-looking building designed and built between 1961 and 1979, e-mail it to me and I’ll send you a prize.)

Anyway, most of you who know me personally know that I like history, and I particularly like to observe how things change, subtly or radically, over time. It’s why I chose to include the “This Used To Be…” series of photos in my 90’s Playlist series. I was also inspired by a series of books called Then & Now which juxtapose vintage pictures with those taken at the same place in modern times. I decided I could do the same thing based on the pictures in Images of America: Marysville by Tammy L. Hopkins and Henry Delamere. So I headed out with my camera and a copy of the book to document the changes that Marysville has gone through. It sometimes took some hardcore squinting at the old photos, and a little guesswork, but I think I matched things up okay. My photos don’t look too great for the simple reason that I’m a shitty photographer with cheap equipment, and also because occasionally time or guesswork failed me when I was on site in Marysville (I took a few shots of the wrong side of the street), so I used images captured from Google Street View instead.

So, with your patient indulgence, allow The Holy Bee of Ephesus to present MARYSVILLE: THEN & NOW.

First of all, a map to orient any of you unfamiliar with the town.

Most of the historic stuff we’ll be seeing is in the rectangular area bounded by E St. to the west, B St. to the east, Ellis Lake to the north, and 1st St. to the south. There are some exceptions, but that’s pretty much it. Over the Feather River to the west is Marysville’s “twin” city of Yuba City, which is much bigger and fancies itself more sophisticated. I lived off of 14th Street, on the north side of Ellis Lake (outside the map’s top boundary.)

Excuse me while I go into full historian mode for a moment (picture me lighting a pipe and brushing the lint off one of my suede elbow patches).

In 1842, California was still part of Mexico, albeit a part in which no one but American settlers had any interest in residing. The Mexican government gave huge land grants to anyone who could fog a mirror, and much of it ended up in the grip of California grand poobah and somewhat lunkheaded businessman John Sutter. Sutter leased some of his approximately one kajillion acres of northern California land to Prussian immigrant Theodor Cordua, who established an adobe trading post at the convergence of the Yuba and Feather Rivers. As the bemused Maidu Indians looked on, munching their acorn paste, Cordua presumably shouted something to them like “Hey, can you give me a hand with this crate?” and by 1849, all the slower Indians in the area were “employed” as laborers by Cordua and his business partners. The rest had understandably scattered. (The term “Yuba,” which was applied to the river and general surroundings came from either a small band or sub-tribe of these Native Americans, or a variation on the Spanish word for “grape” — uva. Take your pick.)

Cordua gave his settlement the name of “New Mecklenburg,” but his more sensible neighbors decided that was a blazingly stupid name, and took to calling it Cordua’s Ranch, or simply “The Plaza.” When the Gold Rush hit, it became an important way station for people traveling to the ore-rich Sierra Nevada foothills, which began a few miles to the east. A few of the bigger steamboats coming up from the Bay Area began making New Mecklenburg a stop. (The first steamboat to navigate the Yuba River was the Linda, whose name lives on in a scuzzy little meth town just south of Marysville.)

A watercolor of how “The Plaza” once looked
The general area of “The Plaza” nowadays, buried deep under the Yuba River levee I’m standing on to take the picture.
It was decided that the Silver Dollar Saloon on 1st St. (my favorite Marysville watering hole when I have to choose one – sheriff’s car optional), which backs up to the levee, is the presently standing structure that’s as near as possible to the old Cordua place, so that’s where they chose to stick the New Mecklenburg” historical plaque.

Cordua sold off big chunks of his holdings to various speculators, but much of it went to a French immigrant named Charles Covillaud, who was rolling in profits from the early days of the Gold Rush. Everyone was making money hand over fist. (Except for the Chinese immigrants who poured into Marysville by the wagonful, and established a mini-Chinatown around 1st and C Streets. The Chinese referred to Marysville as “Sam Fow,” or “Third City” as it was the third city they came to after passing through San Francisco and Sacramento.) Covillaud then sold portions of his holdings to professional adventurers Jose Ramirez of Chile and John Sampson of Britain (by way of Chile) for another tidy profit. It was that kind of time. Frenzied buying, selling, subdividing. Entrepreneurs, soldiers-of-fortune, and various miscreants flocking in from everywhere, everything coated with a fine layer of gold dust. Craziness.

The portion of land Covillaud cannily kept for himself is what became the city of Marysville proper. He named it after his wife, Mary Murphy, who was a Donner Party survivor (and thus, a suspected cannibal, which never seems to get mentioned.) Much was made of this, though I don’t see why. In the mid-1800’s, if you survived one gruesome life-threatening event, another was waiting in line almost immediately. Sure enough, ol’ Mary checked out at age 36.

A woodcut depicting the earliest days of what was by now called “Marysville.” It could be depicting Professor Harelip Jenkins and His Magical Dancing Bananas for all I can see, as these fucking woodcuts are impossible to look at without getting a migraine. But, y’know, they’re historical and all, so they must be important.

There seemed to be no limit to what Marysville could accomplish. It was the seventh (or possibly eighth) incorporated city in the new state of California, and there was talk of it even becoming the state capital. Developers began selling it as the “New York of the Pacific.” Imposing brick structures replaced the adobe huts and canvas tents. Greatness was in their grasp.

Then the dumb bastards went and burned it all down within a year.


Upon rebuilding, the citizens of Marysville soon discovered that their settlement was just as susceptible to flooding as any other town in the central valley of California. Californians loved building permanent settlements on floodplains, because that’s where the best farming is. But listen to the word: floodplains. See what it does there? The word is its own definition. Floodplains have a tendency to flood. It’s not that the Hardy Pioneers weren’t aware of the situation, but they seemed not to care, relying on engineering (bypasses and levees) to solve the issue. Difficult as it is to envision now, the earliest descriptions of Marysville describe it as being situated on bluffs above the Yuba River, so at first it seemed like flooding wouldn’t be a problem at all. Marysvillians could enjoy a sense of smug superiority, being literally above it all.

Then the place started flooding anyway.

It gradually dawned on the smarter ones that hydraulic mining upriver was increasing the sediment load and, thus, raising the level of the riverbed. The bluffs were disappearing. In 1875, a team of engineers put together an intricate series of levees designed to protect the town and its precious commerce. When they finished up, wiped their brows and had a look around, they realized they had entirely hemmed in the city with levees. It would forever be confined to its 1875 borders.

Adding insult to injury, the increased sediment in the riverbed caused the big paddle-wheeled riverboats to be unable to navigate as far north as Marysville. Sacramento got all of its business. Marysville as a major shipping port with the potential to be the “New York of the Pacific” was no more. So, Marysville population circa 1853: about 10,000. Population circa 2009: just under 12,000. For most of its existence, Marysville has been a slightly bitter, kind of backward little town that had all of its hope to be something better snuffed out over 130 years ago.

OK, let’s make with the photos before I put you all to sleep…Click on the pics for a more close-up look.

A touch of Marysville’s original Wild West flavor can be seen in this photo of Kelly Brothers’ Stables on E Street
It burned down in 1915. (Note the man in the foreground being conspicuously unhelpful, for fear his snazzy straw boater might blow away.) The Kelly Brothers also ran an undertaking business on D Street.
As rootin’ and tootin’ as it tries to be, the Java Detour that today sits at the same location just doesn’t cut it.
Another glimpse of life on the frontier as we look south down C Street at the Golden Eagle Hotel.

The Golden Eagle’s interior.

Looking south down C Street at the grassy vacant lot (just beyond the cement traffic pillars) where the Golden Eagle once stood. I don’t know if it burned down, but I kind of suspect it did.
Ah, here’s one of the earliest J.C. Penney stores in California merrily burning away at 316 D Street.
To be replaced with a coffee shop. (In the 1990’s, this was called “Mahler’s,” and you’ll be reading about it in an upcoming This Used To Be My Playground.)
Up until the 1950’s, the Del Pero’s California Market was the most modern and pristine supermarket to be found north of Sacramento, pioneering developments in portion control and freeze-drying, and employing a fleet of vehicles to make home deliveries. (If you squint, you can make out the slogan We’re Glad To Meat You on one of the trucks. If this is what passed for humor in the 1950s, you can tell why the world was ready for Lenny Bruce.)
Looking for it today? Uh-uh. Burned down. Evidently, a sausage-making machine went kerflooey on Christmas Day, 1956, and roasted the joint, taking the Masonic Lodge building next door with it for good measure. True story. Today it’s a Jimboy’s and its associated parking lot.
The Masonic Lodge that perished in the Great Christmas Sausage Fire of 1956.
The parking lot where the Masonic Lodge used to be.
The Western Hotel once stood at the corner of 2nd and D. In its early years of operation, it was a miracle of 19th-century hotel design, boasting the only elevator, steam heaters, and electricity in any hotel between Sacramento and Portland.
I guess I can’t technically say the Western “burned down,” but the inevitable fire caused enough damage that the building was demolished in 1956.
Today, the area where the Western Hotel once was is occupied by a bus stop and the tree-lined parking lot of Mervyn’s, which went out of business at the end of 2008. The large Mervyn’s building now sits empty, staring eerily out at the downtown business district it was meant to save.

Tired of fires? Okay.

Here’s the equally prestigious United States Hotel on 3rd and C Streets.

My otherwise reliable Marysville book states fancifully that “In 1867, while campaigning, Ulysses S. Grant stayed at the [U.S.] Hotel.” For one thing, Grant was still in the military in 1867, had his hands full dealing with Reconstruction, and never left D.C. For another, no self-respecting 19th-century presidential candidate would “campaign”(as we understand the term) a full year before the election, before receiving the nomination, and certainly not in the wilds of California. Grant did not even attend his own party’s convention in 1868. A little research and common sense is all it takes, people! Get it right if you’re going to put it in a book. (Blogs get more leeway.) If Grant stayed in the hotel (I’m not saying he didn’t), it was most certainly in the fall of 1879, when he was on his post-presidential world tour. He passed through California after crossing the Pacific from Yokohama. OK, lecture mode “off.”

Where the United States Hotel once stood is now the shady backside of the Yuba County Library.
Next to the U.S. Hotel was Marysville’s original City Hall and Fire Station.
Which leads us to a continued view of the ass-end of the Yuba County Library that now occupies the spot.

The first Marysville Court House stood at 6th and D Street.
The parking lot of the Gold Country Bank has a historical marker to indicate the old court house’s location.
What about the “new” courthouse? Well, here’s a look at Cortez Square, a shady spot bordered by 5th & 6th Streets and B & C Streets, and site of the fifth California State Fair in 1858.
And its replacement – the eye-wateringly ugly “new” courthouse of 1962.
The post office building on C Street was built in 1934-39.
And little has changed. I mean, how much can you really do with a post office building?

The Packard Library across the street from the post office opened in 1906 as the first free library west of the Mississippi. (Most libraries charged a small membership fee back in those days.)

It also still exists relatively unchanged, except for the fact it’s no longer a library. We’ve already seen the “new” library (the back of it, anyway) earlier. Nowadays the Packard Library Building is home to a few private offices, as well as the headquarters of the Yuba-Sutter chapter of everyone’s favorite teen sobriety program Friday Night Live, and the high-ceilinged central hall can host your wedding or special event.

Some pretty nice old private residences still exist in the area west of E Street, but a lot of the ostentatious mansions of the city’s founders are gone.

The house of Mayor Norman Rideout once stood on 5th and E Streets. It was later converted to a hospital that bore his name.

Rideout Hospital relocated several blocks southwest, and the old house was demolished and replaced with the Marysville Hotel in 1927.
The Marysville Hotel got less than a half-century of glory. It was derelict and abandoned long before I moved to the area as a child. Every once in awhile, there’s some big talk about refurbishing it into “luxury condominiums” or “prime office space,” but look at it, for chrissakes. No one’s ever going to do anything with it except put it out of its misery, and even that won’t come anytime soon.
This was the home of the Ellis family at 8th and D, who gave their name to the lake that lies a block to the north.
It is now the site of St. John’s Episcopal Church.
The Belcher family were prominent city attorneys instrumental in halting the destructive hydraulic mining on the Yuba River. Their home stood on C Street.
The “new” City Hall (dating from 1939) now occupies a space just to the north of where the Belcher house once stood.

As it happens, three of the oldest houses in Marysville are still standing.

First is Chilean Jose Ramirez’s “The Castle,” which dates from 1851, and is rumored to be built like a fortress to withstand an Indian attack. Although even as early as 1851, the half-dozen or so Indians still hanging around the area were in no condition to attack anything except a bottle of whiskey. The little bands of valley Maidus weren’t exactly raging Apaches to begin with. Ramirez’s Castle once looked out upon Cortez Square. (This 1960s shot was the earliest picture I could find.)

The place still looks pretty much the same, though it’s in need of some restoration, and instead of looking out on Cortez Square, it now looks out at the new courthouse. Scroll up if you need a reminder of what that dungpile looks like.

Former adjutant general for the state of California and founder of the California National Guard, Edward Forbes lived in this house on D Street, built in 1854.

Until recently, the building served as the Historic Forbes House Restaurant, but now sits vacant.

The 1856 house of Francis Aaron, founder of Marysville Water Co. and Northern California Savings & Loan, also went for the “medieval castle” look that was all the rage in the mid-1850’s.

Now it is the Mary Aaron Museum, a well-meaning if slightly underwhelming collection of antique furniture and clothing. They’ve got some good pictures, though.

Want more? I gots more. But let’s call it a day for now. I’ve been beavering away at this time-waster for (checks time) over five hours now. And that’s just the text. I’m committed to finishing this because I already spent last night scanning and sorting all the pictures.

Next entry coming soon. There’ll be more fires, I promise.

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Moving Day

July was a much busier month than any month during summer vacation has a right to be. Mostly due to the big move back to Sacramento after over four years of stagnating up north in the Yuba-Sutter area. (As the ’90s playlist series demonstrates, I’ve already stagnated there once before in my high school/college years.) I’ve spent the last two of those years stuck in Marysville, the town that literally can’t grow (I’ll explain why in the next entry.) Now I can at least stagnate in a place that has decent bookstores.

Moving house isn’t fun in the best of times, but it’s especially enervating during the hottest week of the year thus far, on average. (July 15-22, 2009, look it up.) There were times at the end of the day when my clothes looked like I had jumped in a pool. My raging taste for alcohol subsided, and was replaced with an obsession with Wild Cherry Pepsi Super Big Gulps (I must have had two dozen in five days.) I wasn’t moving a glass menagerie and little lace doilies, either. My “stuff” consists of about 400,000 pounds worth of CDs, DVDs, and the Movers’ Bane: books. I am a literate and highly well-read fellow, and that comes with a price beyond a simple loss of social skills – it means every time you move, you have to box up all those goddamn books, and, well…move them, as the term implies. And nothing weighs more than a box full of books, with the possible exception of a fully filled tropical aquarium.

And most of that stuff I moved by myself. It wasn’t until I got to the furniture that I had to call in reinforcements – namely WH and RF, who gamely assisted me in squeezing a 35-inch wide couch through a 33½-inch wide door. (It only landed directly on WH’s hand once, and I’m told he’s healing nicely, with almost full mobility regained.)

“Next time, we’re just going to heave it over the back fence and bring it through the sliding glass door,” I panted to WH as we collapsed at the conclusion of the ordeal.

“No. You’re never moving again, asshole,” was WH’s response. (I inferred the “asshole” from his tone.)

Once everything was pretty much in its place, the next order of business was hitting the store to get all the things you need to replace when you move. New toilet brush, new broom, some hooks, some lightbulbs…and I have never felt as gay as I did standing there trying to determine which fuzzy toilet seat cover/bathmat set to buy. “Just because I’m straight doesn’t mean I have to live like a savage” became my official motto of the day as I went off to explore house plants and throw rugs.

Then the cable guy came to hook up my TV and internet. He wasn’t the jovial, wisecracking, sleeveless redneck I had come to expect from the portrayals of cable guys in the popular media. No, my cable guy was a bitter, eye-rolling quasi-sophisticate of about 23, vibrating with barely suppressed rage, and he clearly believed that his recent college degree entitled him to a life that didn’t include crawling around in the privet hedges outside my townhouse. Clearly, I should be the one mucking in the shrubbery, and he should be deciding on throw rugs. (Things are tough all over, Rob From AT&T, and maybe someday you’ll go far. But not with that attitude.)

The first cable guy did not have what was required in his magic van, and promised to return the next day. Anyone familiar with cable guy promises knows that he had no intention of returning without my calling and making a second appointment. Which I did. The situation required a second and third visit from Cable Guy #2, the altogether more amiable Eduardo, who spent much of his time gleefully bad-mouthing Rob.

With the computer finally set to go, I discovered that the copious notes I made on the next entry of This Used To Be My Playground had not been saved before I shut down and packed up. So, until I’m motivated enough to start the entry from scratch, I’ve decided to pay a little tribute to the city I’m leaving behind. Watch for The Holy Bee Presents MARYSVILLE: Then & Now to pop up here, perhaps later today, perhaps tomorrow.

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This Used To Be My Playground, Part 5: Smells Like Teen…age Fanclub?

There are many pieces of advice floating around out there when it comes to dating, most of them grade-A horseshit. It’s in matters of the heart where human behavior least conforms to set patterns. (Matters of the crotch are where human behavior most conforms to set patterns, but that was still a couple of months in my future.) “The prettiest girl never gets asked out because the boys are too intimidated” was one old saw that came a-cropper with the Holly Van Stone Christmas dance invitation. “Girls are attracted to confidence” was another bald-faced lie. I was far more confident than my track record entitled me to be, and was getting skunked left and right. “It’ll happen when you’re not looking for it.” I never stopped looking for it, and it happened.

On Wednesdays and Fridays in Creative Writing, we put our desks in the “sharing circle” and read aloud our works in progress. When circle time came, I usually ended up next to a senior named Ronny Williams on my right, and on his right was another senior named Emily. Ronny and I had grown into a comfortable acquaintanceship, and he was clearly a close friend of Emily’s. I don’t recall ever saying a word to Emily before, mostly because she was a senior girl, and I didn’t quite pack the gear to talk to senior girls. One Wednesday in mid-December, Ronny was reading some of Emily’s poetry aloud for her. For reasons described earlier, I was in a fairly irritable and snarky mood that month, and certainly ready to call any feminine prima-donnaism on the carpet, even if it was a senior.

This Used To Be My Creative Writing Class, YCHS. Now it’s a computer lab for the Art Dept.

“Is she not capable of reading her material, Ron?” I asked in a slightly-too-loud voice. Emily looked at me with an expression that would become all too familiar in the coming years: withering contempt, but it was intermingled with a bemused shock that caused her mouth to drop open momentarily.

“She has laryngitis, Matt,” Ronny said. Emily snapped her mouth closed, and offered me an up-close look at the shiny metal cast on her middle finger that had been broken in an earlier mishap.

It was damn near love at first sight–although I had seen her plenty of times in class before that, so I guess it was love at first vaguely hostile confrontation. (There would be more of those.) Continue reading

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Sad day

A lot of us lost a good friend today when Jeff McKinney passed away. He was one of my best friends for awhile in the mid-90s, a sometime roommate (when it suited him), and a memorable road trip companion. He had a machine-gun mouth and an enormous heart, and was a hilarious co-conspirator in all manner of mischief.

The Holy Bee trying to keep a good man down, 1994

Jeff was the first person to sign my senior yearbook
When I put together the blog entries dealing with my first girlfriend, Brenda, in a failed attempt at brevity, I did not mention my bitter rival for her affection: Nathan Schumer, another member of the class of ’93 who left too soon. At each others’ throats for all of freshman year, we developed a grudging affection for each other over the years, and ended high school as pretty good friends. Just after McKinney wrote his “sentimental bullshit,” Nathan added his two cents:
Two all-around good guys who deserved a longer run, one gone in 2006 and the other just today. Both made their marks on my life…and on the inside cover of my yearbook, moments apart, on an overcast June day in 1993. Rest in peace.

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This Used To Be My Playground, Part 4: Kryptonite & Stomach-Aches

Upon returning to high school for my junior year, I found myself in the unique (to me) position of being something of a known commodity. I had spent two years maneuvering my way up from being a friendless and awkward nobody from a nowhere middle school to rubbing shoulders with folks in letterman jackets and cheerleader skirts. I was by no means a member of the elite, the inside circle, but the elite knew me. I was no longer a cipher. In dramatic moments of adolescent self-pity, I still thought of myself as the neglected outsider, but I could no longer really play that card, even to myself. In the brutal high school social strata, I now outranked the morbidly obese, the harelipped, the bad-skinned. I had bit and clawed my way into the comfortable middle. Enough acceptance to keep me from slitting my wrists or experimenting with auto-erotic asphyxiation, but enough angst to keep my edge and feed my growing cynicism.

The Holy Bee and Holy Bee the Elder in front of the “Mattmobile.” (I had the sweatshirt long before I attended the school.)

I was secure in a fairly tight circle of friends, I had a conspicuous (read: ugly) vehicle that announced my presence with noise and color, and was meticulously putting together some emotional armor thanks to some hard lessons. Shelby? I was one of about fifteen boys that she expressed an interest in that month. Gina? She liked reform school boys. (May eventually have stopped liking boys altogether, if her mullet and Toyota 4X4 were any indication.) Amanda? Didn’t like me. Never did. Never would. But liked the fact that I liked her, and shamelessly played upon that for over two years whenever she was bored with the thousands of other things she had going for her. She was my Ideal Girl, from the first week of high school when I saw her in Introduction to Physical Science (IPS) to halfway through junior year, when I met…well, wait for song #41 in the next installment. Continue reading

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New "Playground" entry coming soon!

For you few who follow the past and present adventures of the Holy Bee, it’s been a long time since the last installment. Why the delay? Apart from a fairly hectic (for me) last few weeks at work, and working in fits and starts on the Idle Time Decades project, I have been stymied by the loss of a picture. A new entry in the 90’s Playlist series has been in the works for quite some time (half-written), but in my quest to provide you with unparalleled quality, I have been turning my house upside down in search of an old picture that will complement the written piece perfectly. I may have to give up on the search soon, and push on without it.

So the next entry (#36-40 — don’t let the small amount of songs fool you, it’s another epic) will be up by the end of the week, along with, perhaps, a Holy Bee Recommends entry for good measure.

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This Used To Be My Playground, Part 3: Cruising With Mushroom Girl

Having a car meant a number of things, not least of which was not having to bum rides off of Kevin S. and his vintage Volvo. Kevin had scored his license during the last quarter of sophomore year, and when he grudgingly granted my request for a daily lift (round-trip), I knew my royal blue Schwinn Neu Citi (“The Ford Edsel of Schwinn 10-Speeds”) was retired forever.

It wasn’t a free ride, by any means. I paid every day in ritual humiliation as Kevin and fellow passenger Rob L. would slowly approach where I stood outside my parents’ glorified apartment (“townhouse”) then quickly accelerate, forcing me to trot after them, until I got just close enough to reach the back door, at which point the acceleration was repeated, to the delight of all except Your Humble Narrator. If Kevin and Rob got a really early start, they would park the Volvo a block or so away, and crawl into the dense shrubbery that surrounded my domicile, make a few Monty Python-esque yelps of “Ni!” or “Meep!” then dash back to the car with me in hot pursuit. Every so often, they would call my answering machine and fill it with chants of “we hate your speed bumps, we hate your speed bumps, we hate your speed bumps, God, they suck.” (Yes, the interior driveways of my townhouse facility were practically corrugated with speed bumps.)

But I took it. Because all that was still better than riding my bike to school. And I knew my license was coming soon.

In one of life’s cruel coincidences, I received my license the same month that the city of Marysville banned “the cruise.” I’m sure every medium-sized town with a lack of better things to do has had some version of the cruise ever since the advent of paved roads. To see an example of this in action you can rent American Graffiti, which depicts a northern California cruise circa 1962, or come along with the Holy Bee for a moment as I walk you through a northern California cruise circa 1991. On Saturday nights, hundreds of kids aged about 16 to 20 (old enough to drive but too young to get into bars) would drive slowly up the main street of the town, reach the outskirts, turn around, and drive slowly back. There were frequent stops at Carl’s Jr, and AM/PM, frequent switching of cars (each car usually carried no fewer than five kids), and shouted conversations and come-ons between cars at stoplights. This rite of passage for several generations of young motorists, celebrated in hit songs and major motion pictures, I got to be a part of exactly once before The Man shut it down permanently.

It was after we had all left Joanne B.’s Hawaiian-themed 16th birthday party held at some roadhouse’s rented party hall out on Lindhurst Ave, which I don’t think is there anymore. A group of us ended up in the back of a Toyota pickup (I forget whose), on the cruise for the first and last time in my life, with a large box of those leis made out of plastic garbage bag material. Of course, this provided us with an absolutely sublime proposition for other cruisers: “Wanna get lei’d?” Who could resist that? As it turns out, everyone.

“Cruising Prohibited” signs went up shortly after that early August night. Continue reading

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This Used To Be My Playground, Part 2: Touching Yourself In A Blaze Of Glory

The line marking the cultural beginning and end of a decade is a fuzzy one. Any one who doubts 1980 was still part of the 70’s can just take a look at a 1980 JC Penney’s catalog and marvel at the width of the bell-bottoms, or look at a list of the top-selling 1980 songs and count up the disco tracks. Anyone who doubts 1990 was still in the clammy grasp of the 80’s need only look at the Yuba City High School 1990 yearbook, and observe the enormous Vuarnet sunglasses, Reeboks, and feathered hair.

#9. “Vogue” – Madonna

#10. “Blaze Of Glory” – Jon Bon Jovi

In piecing together the smoking ruins of my ego after the First Breakup, I realized I had to expand my social circle. Mr. Tackmier’s Geography C class seemed like

a good place to start. I became friends with guys like Jeff W., Kevin S., and Bret K. Through Anthony W. in math class, I met up with guys like Jeff O., Eric L., and Pawen D.

On the last day of school freshman year, I went to see Dick Tracy with Jeff W., which featured lots of Madonna songs, but not this one. It came from the album I’m Breathless: Music From and Inspired By The Film Dick Tracy. How Warren Beatty’s brutal evisceration of the Dick Tracy character with his engorged ego inspired a treatise on dance moves from gay discos is anyone’s guess, but I’m Breathless kicked off a trend of “inspired by” albums where artists loosely associated with a movie’s soundtrack could unload their B-sides and outtakes. (The Madonna video hit around the same time, featuring our pal Madoo in a see-through shirt that wasn’t quite see-through, though not for lack of trying on my part. A Holy Bee Tip of the Hat to the original queen of titillation.)

That summer, Jeff W. and I rode our bikes out to Movies 8 to see Young Guns II, which is better than the original (and if that isn’t damning with faint praise, then I don’t know what is.) The accompanying Jon Bon Jovi (solo) music video serves as a reminder that they used to drop some serious fuckin’ coin on music videos. Jon strummed his acoustic and mouthed his watered-down remake of “Wanted Dead Or Alive” on a massive, detailed set built on the edge of a cliff, and was photographed with more swooping helicopter shots than you can shake a stick at.

#11. “Moneytalks” – AC/DC

When school started up again in the fall of ‘90, I must have spotted half-a-dozen The Razor’s Edge T-shirts under the denim jackets of the metal kids heading for the smoking area across from the front of the high school on Frederick Street. I didn’t stare too long, as the wearers surely would’ve singled me out for a beating, and blood would’ve been hard to get out of my preppy Cosby sweater.

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This Used To Be My Playground, Part 1: She’s My Cherry Pie

Hey, folks, does anything suck more than Baby Boomers talking about the 60’s? Did you, like me, watch that Just For Men “Summer Of Life” commercial and wish a lingering death from some kind of impacted anal fissures on the fifty-something douche pretending to play guitar while some blonde thirty-something douchette pretends to be attracted to him through gritted teeth while visions of her Just For Men commercial paycheck dance in her empty little head? Maybe Generation X-ers talking about the 90’s is just a tad more irritating and pointless – but that’s not going to stop me. I’m going to walk you through 300 of the best, worst, and/or most memorable tracks from 1990 through 1999.

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Christmas 1989

Inspired by our Idle Time Decades project, I spent my 2009 spring break  painstakingly compiling a 300-song 1990’s iTunes playlist, cued specifically to my own recollections. To quote the Jack Rabbit Slim’s slogan, it’s “The Next Best Thing To A Time Machine” (and if you don’t know what Jack Rabbit Slim’s is, turn in your 90’s card.) Listening to this playlist is akin to spinning the dial on the best Top 40 radio station of that decade. (Ironically, the 90’s marked the death of true Top 40 radio.) The 1990’s saw me going from a scrawny, gawky, 15-year-old high school freshman to a chubbier, only slightly less gawky, 25-year-old college graduate, father, and (soon-to-be-ex) husband. And of course, all of this growth and drama had a soundtrack. Continue reading

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Holy Bee Recommends, #2: L.A. Noir

One of my many minor obsessions is the seedy underbelly of Los Angeles. Not so much in the present day, but in the middle part of the 20th century. Although many people associate the noir genre with the grimy alleyways of Chicago or the humid waterfronts of New York, its natural home is really Los Angeles. There seems to be more desperate, broken people in Los Angeles than the rest of the world combined. Many were lured there with the dream of making in big in the entertainment industry and found nothing but disappointment and despair, many others just naturally gravitated there to be in the company of thousands of other drifters, losers, hustlers, thugs, eccentrics, and full-blown psychos. What makes the darkness and ugliness of the place more palpable is it’s glamorous surface, beautiful people doing beautiful things under palm trees and hazy SoCal sunshine. But it’s all a sham. The good life in L.A. is lived by about 5% of its population.

Whether it’s a fleabag hotel downtown, or a (relatively) inexpensive apartment in Covina, on the other side of the door, there’s a good chance that someone’s soul is slowly rotting from the inside out.

Every so often, I get the urge to take a drive down to L.A. and explore. Take a cruise past where the Black Dahlia’s corpse was found. Past the nightclub where the unsuccessful hit on Mickey Cohen went down. Past the blocks and blocks of stucco apartments in West Hollywood inhabited by waiters who want to be actors. Down the notorious skid row of Fifth Street (affectionately referred to in Tom Waits songs as “The Nickel”), where any vice is available for rock-bottom prices. Luckily, thanks to Google Street View, I can get a little taste of it without driving almost 800 miles round trip, discover that the location was obliterated for a Quizno’s, or risk my soft suburban neck in insanely dangerous neighborhoods.

James Ellroy, author of The Black Dahlia and L.A. Confidential, is the greatest current purveyor of period L.A. crime fiction. He knows the subject in and out, because he lived a good deal of his life on the skids in the City of Angels — drunk and pilled up, either homeless or in jail for shoplifting – or breaking and entering plush Wilshire homes to fondle ladies’ underwear.
All of this is revealed in Ellroy’s riveting autobiographical book, My Dark Places: An L.A. Crime Memoir.

It doesn’t take Freud to uncover the reasons for Ellroy’s downward spiral. It was triggered by the brutal slaying of his mother in 1958, when he was ten years old. Ellroy admits his mother, vivacious redhead Geneva “Jean” Ellroy, was not a model parent: she was an alcoholic who was not particular about the company she kept, and would often leave young Ellroy alone at night to go drinking and dancing at the dive bars that lined Valley Boulevard in El Monte, just east of L.A. One night, she didn’t come home. Her strangled body, pantyhose tied around her neck, was found the next morning in the shrubbery next to Arroyo High School. Despite several strong leads, including several eyewitnesses who spotted her with a swarthy man in a blue convertible, the murder was never solved and the case went cold.

Ellroy was placed in the custody of his father, an embittered invalid who was dead (of natural causes) before Ellroy was out of his teens. Once he went through the crucible of being a drug-addled petty criminal pervert and emerged on the other side as a respected author (“The Demon Dog of American crime fiction”), he became interested in the incident that started him down his life’s path. Working with detectives, Ellroy re-opened his mother’s case, and began sifting through the grisly photos and statements, re-interviewing witnesses, and attempting to come to grips with the psycho-sexual hold his mother had over his subconscious for most of his existence.

There are few dark places darker than Ellroy’s, and his unflinching honesty at examining himself, expressed in the same vivid staccato prose he uses in his fiction, makes for a gripping, if sometimes uncomfortable, read.

Another young L.A. thug-turned-writer is Edward Bunker. Bunker spent the late 1940s and 1950s in and out of juvenile hall and foster homes, or living on the streets. Bunker was unable to resist the easy money of drug-dealing and armed robbery, despite an off-the-chart IQ and a taste for Shakespeare and Dickens – which he had plenty of time to peruse once he started doing hard time in places like San Quentin and Folsom prisons.

Bunker’s memoir, Education of a Felon, recounts his escapades, both as a criminal and his attempt at a “straight” job: working as an assistant and confidant for the mentally unstable wife of Paramount Pictures’ super-producer Hal B. Wallis. His descriptions of prison life make it sound not so bad for someone who follows the official and unofficial rules, at least until the race wars began in the late 1960s, and suddenly no one was safe. Upon his release in 1975 after almost two decades behind bars, he was already a published author — his autobiographical 1973 novel No Beast So Fierce was adapted into the 1978 film Straight Time, with Dustin Hoffman as the Bunker character. Bunker continued to write and also dabble in bit-part acting – culminating in his crowning achievement, at least as far as most people are concerned: his performance as Mr. Blue in Reservoir Dogs. (“I liked her early stuff – ‘Borderline’ – but when she hit that ‘Papa Don’t Preach’ phase, I tuned out.”)

A special treat: On the bonus disc of the 10th anniversary Reservoir Dogs DVD, there is a driving tour of L.A. with Bunker, where he points out the locations of his nefarious doings. It’s certainly better than ogling the locations on Street View, and you get the benefits of Bunker’s hard-boiled narration. Best part: Bunker’s story of meeting up with future Reservoir Dogs co-star Lawrence Tierney, in the process of putting a beatdown on someone outside of a bar. It was not surprising that Tierney, an actor with one foot in the criminal underworld, and Bunker, a criminal with one foot in the movie world, should have crossed paths in 1950s L.A., almost forty years before they met up again in front of Tarantino’s cameras. This fascinating tour is not included on the most recent (15th anniversary) edition of the DVD. Boo.

I’ll conclude by acknowledging of the Granddaddy of L.A. Noir, Raymond Chandler. Beginning in 1939, his iconic private eye, Philip Marlowe, smoked, drank, and snooped his way through such classics as The Big Sleep, Farewell My Lovely, and The Long Goodbye. Only Dashiell Hammett equals Chandler as the primary architect of literary noir. Philip Marlowe has been played onscreen by such noted cinematic tough guys as Humphrey Bogart, James Caan, Robert Mitchum and…Elliott Gould?

Yes, Ross and Monica’s father once donned Marlowe’s trench coat and snub-nosed revolver in director Robert Altman’s shaggy-dog 1973 adaptation of The Long Goodbye. Disjointed and quirky as only an Altman film can be, this Long Goodbye is updated from the booze-and-dames 50s to the cocaine-and-nudists 70s. The plot of the book and the plot of the novel are distant cousins, and the new time period allows Altman opportunities to satirize the shallow and hedonistic lifestyles of most of the characters. Gould’s take on Marlowe is decidedly un-heroic, and unlike the rich shadows of traditional film noir, The Long Goodbye utilizes a gauzy palette of washed-out pastels.

Also recommended: The film version of L.A. Confidential (avoid the Black Dahlia film), Wonderland (not a great film, but an incredibly creepy tone and atmosphere), Hollywoodland, Chinatown, any one of Tom Waits’ first seven albums, Chandler’s final Marlowe novel Poodle Springs (unfinished at his death, it was completed thirty years later by Spenser author Robert B. Parker), Ellroy’s novels The Big Nowhere and White Jazz (together with Dalia and Confidential, they make up his “L.A. Quartet”), and what is probably Tarantino’s best film, Jackie Brown (yes, you read that right.)

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